The Window

Photography by Andrew Harris
Instagram- @blastpeed

I think humans get to an age where whoever they have been all their life, is what they will remain as. Some people will never change. That is something I have found hard to accept.

When we are children, our personalities and qualities are mostly formed by what we see of our role models.  As well as our environment, children also form habits from their reactions to the actions of adults.  A sure fire way to ensure a child grows up lacking confidence is to constantly criticize with very little praise: child grows up questioning their self worth.  Lack of emotional support and affection can make a child feel unlovable.  An adult who feels unloved will veer towards partners who control them.

Personally, after childhood I believe there is a window where a person can really look at themselves and really judge whether they are living right.  I don't think we all have an epiphany where we say 'Oh I have just realised I have an anger issue', but sometimes events or even the words of someone close can highlight our shortfalls.

If this happens to you, please don't be offended! It is the feedback from others which can help us truly see how we come across.  Now I'm not saying listen to the friend who calls you a nutbag during an argument over who puts the milk in the cup first or who doesn't, but if you are going through life hearing the same comments about your way of living, maybe its time to listen up.

Feel blessed, because you got your window of opportunity.  It may happen to everyone, although not everyone will grab that Unicorn by the horn.  Slowly, the wind breezes by, and ever so gradually edges that window shut before a man in a dark robe comes and paints the thing shut; this is your life now.

Those people who are shut in will rattle your cage and dare I say piss you off, and you know what you can do about it? Get over it.  Just get over it mate.  Habit is a beautiful thing when challenged but damaging to those in the vicinity. Habits will have you stressing and running around cursing behind peoples backs and whinging, and they don't even belong to you.  The harsh reality is we have to sometimes accept people for who they are.  We must create a crack in the wall, in order to take a shortened trip throughout their life, to discover why they are, the way they are.

Once you make that discovery, feel rich in the knowledge of another persons personality journey and use that to forgive their actions.  Forgiveness is the only thing that will free you from the mental pain of how someone else treats you. Forgive them and adjust your actions accordingly.  
After all, do you think they are losing sleep over your anguish?

This post goes out to everyone living with their windows open.  Your demons may be hard to fight but don't give up.  Do it for the people around you.  Do it for your loved ones.  Don't be a person who people tolerate because they have labelled 'unchangeable'.
You are worth more than that.

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