We gravitate towards each other , before we even know why we have arrived. The universe puts us in the same place in order to provoke a reaction. We acted accordingly.  It was written.  Little did we know we had already lost.

In the days that follow, we become further engrossed in each others persona.  Slowly infiltrating, the others life, aiming to become part of the furniture in their world- that's the dream isn't it?  Gradually fulfilling the void that we have created in our own hearts, growing stronger as we feed off the strength of each other.  Before we know it, dependency is rife, and we are oblivious to its cons.  Remembering that hindsight exists will bring reality into focus, and invoke wishes of 'I wish I had seen this coming.' What a cliché.

Times goes on and shortly after the initial attraction, hurdles show up frequently, and continuously.  If you have to jump too often, you shouldn't really continue; that's obvious now.  Gut feelings are ignored, alarm bells ring out unanswered. For, unfortunately, that 3 letter phrase has crept into our hearts and slyly enslaved our broken souls.  We became bound too quickly perhaps.

Life flows on, and what is known as the honeymoon period doesn't really seem to exist.  Anyway, that turns into full blown relationship very swiftly.  The problem is, it's not real.  We are two people playing mums and dads.  Our obvious improvisation is blindsided by lack of experience, on your part, and that is basically why we were doomed.  Those rose tinted glasses stayed on your face until the very end and beyond.  Your main downfall. 

As predicted, your improvisation skills only carry you so far, and the largest hurdle that did not even belong to you, causes you to throw in the towel, and essentially call it quits.  It was written. 
Freedom can feel like a lonely place, when you have been used to the comfort of someone or something.  The mind retraces the steps made in anger, and verbally tries to pull back at its loss as the negative feelings dissipate and realisation sets it.  Too late. Too, little too late.

The astronomical impact of making a wrong decision on a person, is immeasurable, although physically it is evident.  Its impossible not to wear your mistake like a cloak, forcing your aura to adapt to your inner feelings.  You reek of desperation, and defeat; it's repelling.  What is sad is that, blunders like this tend to stay with us forevermore.  Affecting our future relationships, and blinding our outlook on others.  As we walk off in different directions, your path is littered with shoulda/coulda/woulda, and a millions sorries.  Regrets fly in with huge wings, and carry you off to somewhere unknown to anyone.

You are stuck in your own depressive reverie now, and I am walking the yellow brick road.

Maktub; It was written.

Much Love, EL x

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